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Are you ready for a change of scene?

Had enough of your current job?

Feeling Burnt Out?

The Wake Up Call

 If you feel like you can’t continue in your current existence, you are not alone. Every year thousands of people reach a point where they can no longer continue working in the same way, with the same people or in the same job or industry.

You just wake up one morning and know that it’s time for a change.

I was in my mid-twenties when I reached that point. I had come to hate my job, the industry and I didn’t like most of the people I worked with either.

I felt trapped by the money,  I had a mortgage from the age of 22 and the notion of walking away from a well paid job seemed totally reckless.

I was run down, stressed and miserable and as a result became pretty unwell. After the third spell in hospital, I recognised this as a massive nudge from somewhere deep inside, to wake me up, shake me up and take responsibility for changing my life. I realised I was waiting! Waiting for something to happen. Waiting for someone else to make my life different.

This was at the start of the self-help movement and I read hundreds of books to help me find the confidence and methods to make those changes.  I developed a habit of getting clear about exactly what I wanted and then applying certain steps to make sure I got it.  I’ve retrained in a number of different fields, Psychotherapy, Hypnotherapy, Yoga, Reiki. I’ve become an author, a blogger and a jazz singer. I’ve since spent the best part of twenty-eight years helping  thousands of  people to redefine themselves, to follow their hearts and launch new careers. You can do it.

Want to know how? Here are my starting steps when I want to make change.

Firstly create some space where you can be still and quiet and ask yourself the following questions.

  1. What one thing am I really good at? What one thing do I seem to do naturally well?

Now ignore the voice that throws up the negatives and keep asking yourself  that same question until you get some good answers.

I remember thinking defeatedly ‘I’m not really good at anything, there’s no area in which I excel.’ But I stuck at it and eventually a little voice said “You’re good at talking to people” It was true, I could stand at a bus stop and a total stranger would tell me their entire life story, then get on the bus and say “Do you know I’ve never told anyone that!” Eureka. That was it… the only thing I could come up with!

Yet that simple answer started a whole new career  for me which I still love and enjoy with every cell in my body.

When you’ve come up with a couple of answers write them down, stick them on the back burner.  The process is starting.

   2.  If I didn’t have to worry about what anyone else thinks. If I didn’t have to worry about money or how I would pay my bills. What would I do for work?

Again, ignore all the negative, whiney head trash that wants to bring you down. That’s your ego battling for position! Write down the stream of positives that come to mind, such as … “I’d work with animals, I’d travel the world, or I’d be a yoga teacher”  Now put those ideas into the pot on the back burner.

In a few days some ideas will begin to brew. Watch out for them and write them down.

When you get some idea, some direction that doesn’t contain a negative, you’re ready for the next step.

3. Just suppose (imagine) you were going to do that thing… the idea that you thought of, how would you go about it? What would be your first step of enquiry? Can you google some information?

Can you find someone who’s doing what you’d like to do or has what it is you would like to have? 

If so call or email them and ask if you can buy them, a coffee or lunch, explain that you would like to ask them some questions about their work. Be honest and transparent. Naturally some people will say no, but many are flattered be asked and want to help.

First gather this information. Gradually all the ideas, information and knowledge come together and you will  feel excited. This is your cue.  If it’s a feeling in your heart GO FOR IT!

Find a way to make this happen. Go back to learning, take that course in your spare time, negotiate taking some time out of the workplace. Do what you have to do to kick-start your new career. When it’s something you feel passionate about, trust me, it will not feel like work. You will  be happy to be up to the early hours of the morning writing your plans, or studying, because you know that you are working toward something really meaningful to you. Something heartfelt and positive.

When you live, breathe and talk about your dreams you bring a powerful energy to it that will attract a similar resonance. If it’s your dharma (your calling) doors of opportunity will open for you, you will be wafted along pathways that will support your calling. You will meet the right people at the right time who will share similar dreams and values.

DO NOT share your dreams with people who criticise, judge and search out the negatives in your plans. Why would you. You need to believe in yourself and your dreams.

If you need additional inspiration or support to get you over your fears about making change, grab your copy of my book Super Charge Your Confidence and the accompanying download of the same name from my shop.

Let me know how you get on.

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How are you feeling?

To understand others is to have knowledge. To understand oneself is to be illuminated

How was your festive break? Has it left you feeling rested, recharged and raring to get back to work? Or are you in need of some rest and relaxation after all the energy expended in shopping, wrapping, cooking, visiting or entertaining?

Unfortunately  for some people the Christmas period can generate anxiety. Being out of the natural routine of things can be a trigger for some, whilst others worry about having bought the right gifts, or visited the right relations in the right order. Even people who ordinarily, are emotionally robust, report feeling out of sorts, sometimes being catapulted into their family ‘roles’ can create generalised anxiety.

Whatever your current ‘state’ it might be nice to take a few moments out from doing anything at all. Will you rise to my challenge here and take ten minutes to sit still (preferably upright) and do nothing, absolutely nothing?

When you’ve finished reading this blog, come away from any distractions such as TV, computer, tablet or phone. If possible sit near a window with some natural light.

Keep your eyes open yet heavy-lidded and settle your gaze slightly ahead of you and sit still for 10 minutes.


Allow your mind to wander if it wants to and periodically come back to an awareness of your breathing.

Notice what arises when you keep still in this way. What happens physically? Do you get an itch or irritation somewhere on your body, do you suddenly need to cough, or want to shift around? Just notice.

What happens mentally? Is your mind darting rapidly from one thought to another, from the future to the past? Does the mind draw you into one particular memory that you begin to run over and over? Just notice.

What happens to you emotionally when you sit doing absolutely nothing? Do you feel uncomfortable or peaceful? Do you start to feel sad, anxious or agitated? Do you begin to feel sleepy? Is there an overwhelming desire to get up and move? Override it by calmly bringing your attention back to your breathing.

Taking small chunks of time in this way to practise the art of ‘being’ allows us to become more and more familiar with how it feels to be peaceful and we can then carry that over into other aspects of our day, approaching daily tasks with a calmer detached manner.

Over time these mindfulness techniques can help us to conquer some of the negatives that the mind throws up, so that we use the mind rather than allowing the mind to use us.

Making space to spend time with ourselves can provide opportunities  for insight and understanding of ourselves and others. The Chinese book of philosophy  the Tao Te Ching says ‘To understand others is to have knowledge. To understand oneself is to be illuminated”.

To understand others is to have knowledge. To understand oneself is to be illuminated

I hope 2016 brings enlightenment, peace and joy into your hearts and minds.

Will you accept my challenge? As always I love the feedback so please leave your comments to let us know how you got on.


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I Really Appreciate Your Support And I Have A Favour To Ask…

So, here we are almost at the end of the year and as I look back I realise I’ve been blogging now for the best part of two years every week! My old English teacher would be proud of his teaching I think… not that I’m saying my English is perfect! Just that I hadn’t realised before blogging, how much I enjoy writing. Anyway enough waffle.

This week’s blog is short and different from my usual format as I’m using it to say a really big and heartfelt thank you to those of you who receive my weekly email and take the time to read  and comment on it. It’s a strange experience writing and never really knowing if anyone reads it!

I appreciate how busy you all are and also how many emails you receive, so when you take the time to read mine, I am humbled and grateful. I also want to say thank you to the women who have helped me to get this site and blog up and running efficiently and who continue to share their knowledge and inspire and support me, in various ways Katy, Claire A, Claire D and Natalie.thank-you-text

As well as a time for reflecting I have been looking forward to next year and thinking about future blogs, workshops and courses both online and in person. So here’s the favour, I want to improve thestresshacker and I wonder if you can help me?

What would you like to see more of in future blogs, freebies or other products?

Would you like more yoga tips? More inner child work? More of the Parent, Adult, Child, work that forms Transactional Analysis? To hear more cases (all of which are created by me based on client work in the last twenty-five years, so no real names or events.)

Below are some of the workshops I’ve run over the last twenty-five years.

Dare To Dream and Create The Life You Want To Have?

Money. Have You Got The Right Consciousness To Manifest?

Creative Problem Solving. 

Healing Your Inner Child

Could You Be More Assertive?

How To Create More Self-Confidence

Stress Free Tools And Tips For Really Chilling Out

The Principles Of Goal Setting

Open Heart Therapy.

If you could spare two minutes to tell me which of these grab your attention and let me know by hitting reply to this email.

If there’s anything else that you would particularly like to see offered as a workshop, covered in a blog or recorded as an Hypnosis program I’m all up for the feed-back.

Finally just a quick reminder that if you’re already signed up to the weekly email and you haven’t downloaded your free products… go and get them now by adding them to your basket in the thestresshacker shop and using the code stresshacker. They are the 5 Minute Power Nap, The 7 Minutes of Zen and The Relaxation Response

If you have a problem that you’d like some guidance on then go to the Ask Sue page on the website, please remember your question and answer there, will be public.

If you want a chance to win my new Sleep Well Now ebook and hypnosis program  go to  We will be announcing the winners of this competition at midnight on Wednesday 9th December 2015.

I would love to hear your thoughts and please help me spread thestresshacker word by sharing it with with your friends.

Thanks again and have a great weekend.








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Make your own relaxation recording – step by step guide

How to make your own relaxation recording

When one of my friends recently confided that she was massively stressed out and  just couldn’t relax I asked her what method she was using to relax. She looked at me, perplexed. “I’m not,” she said “I don’t relax. I wouldn’t know how to.”

It put me in mind of where I was some years back, lying in hospital feeling very sorry for myself.

I had suffered a spontaneous  pnueomothorax  (that’s a collapsed lung to you and me). According to the doctors there was no apparent reason for this condition. It happened a total of  THREE TIMES over a two-year period before I finally got the message!

[UPDATE: As promised, I’ve turned this into a free download for you. Click here to get it!]

Continue reading Make your own relaxation recording – step by step guide

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How to Lose Your Baggage and Lighten Up: Thought Hack

Lose baggage and lighten up

What lurks in the shadows? All that stuff we put to the back of the mind to look at sometime later – or perhaps never at all…

Back in the early 90s when I first started my practice the subconscious mind or the unconscious mind as it was often called, was also known as the dark side or the shadow.

What lurks in the shadows? Among many things the shadow houses our memories, perceptions, unresolved issues, and parts of ourselves that we are not too comfortable with.

It’s all that stuff we put to the back of the mind to look at sometime later, or perhaps never at all.

Continue reading How to Lose Your Baggage and Lighten Up: Thought Hack

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Stresshacker Challenge: Change one thing in your relationship today

If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got.

What’s the definition of stupidity? Doing the same thing over and over thinking we’ll get a different result. Yet how often do we do this?

If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got.

Break the Pattern in your Relationship

If something happens once, well there you go, when it happens twice it could be a co-incidence, but when it happens three times? That’s a pattern. So you might want to change something. Just tweaking it a bit may well give you a more pleasing outcome. A scientist wouldn’t dream of repeating an ineffective process over and over, just to see if it works the 20th time around!

If what you’re doing isn’t working, do anything else at all!

It never ceases to amaze me how people do the same thing over and over in relationships – whether they are new dates, or long term relationships. It’s like running the same route in a maze over and over, hoping the outcome will be different. The same is true of any area of life – work, play and study.

So here’s our challenge

What one thing could you do differently today – right here now – that would make a positive shift in the way you relate to your partner, (child, mother, sister, brother, or whoever)?

We want you to try something really simple to interrupt the pattern. For example, you could change the tone of your voice when you’re next asking them for something.  If he always walks the dog, you do it. If you always meet in the same bar or restaurant, change the venue.  If one of you always pays, let the other one do it.  Try approaching your next interaction with that person from a position of wondering what you can do for them rather than what they can do for you.

Just tweak something – do it differently. Change is liberating.

Give it a go and then leave me a comment to let me know how you get on! I’d be really interested to hear the results. Did anything change?