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STOP SMOKING

It’s Stoptober when could there be a better time to Stop Smoking!

What do you shut up and light up and put up with…?

With the average packet of cigarettes costing around between £10 to £12, who can even afford to smoke these days?

I used to be a nicotine addict. I know what it’s like to have your every waking thought be about how soon you could have your next cigarette.

Worse still I did not fall into the category of a ‘habit’ smoker. You know, that annoying person who can have one or two socially and then not smoke again. No, not me I was a slave to it. It dominated every part of my life and my constant thoughts were about the addiction and also how to stop smoking. It had such a  terrible grip on me.

Because I’m somewhat of a control freak (towards myself not others) I couldn’t bear the idea that a piece of paper with some leaves in it, had control over me. Determined  to stop smoking I used everything I knew and I finally did it. I stopped. Moreover  I  have since helped hundreds of people to break the habit and deal with the underlying causes.

Are you serious about wanting to stop smoking?

you can do it and I’m here to tell you that 

IT’S EASIER THAN YOU THINK!

As you will see here, smokers are either habit or compulsive. If you fall into the ‘habit’ category and would like to stop smoking try this approach.

  1. Set a date to stop, say a month from now.
  2. Between now and then keep changing your brand of cigarettes to confuse the habit.
  3. Tell your friends that you are going to stop smoking (this way you become accountable).
  4. Leading up to your stop smoking date, avoid the ‘ritual’ cigarette. Thats the one you always have on your break or after dinner.
  5. Stop smoking in your usual places. In other words change the routine.
  6. Place your cigarettes out of reach so that each time you have one it is a ‘conscious’ action.
  7. Negotiate the odd fag! Ask yourself do I really need it? Drink a full glass of water and if you still want it have it.
  8. When you choose to have a cigarette or vape do it with full consciousness. I.E. don’t don’t do anything else just smoke it mindfully.
  9. Preparation: The day before your stop smoking day, get rid of all of the paraphernalia, ashtrays, lighters etc. Bin them!
  10. Make sure you’ve downloaded Stop Smoking Now from the shop at thestresshacker.com
  11. On your stop date Listen to Stop Smoking Now! Hypnosis Program first thing in the morning and last thing that night.

Compulsive smokers will need to explore the underlying emotions that drive them to smoke. That’s likely to be FAGS, Fear, Anger, Guilt, Shame or all of them.

If all traces of nicotine have left the body after 36 hours (faster if you go for regular steam baths) then you would think the addiction is no longer there wouldn’t you? So what are you left with? Thoughts and feelings.  Even the weakest willed person can change their thoughts… you think about a cigarette – change the thought, you could recite the words of a song for example. Feelings they can be less easy to change and they will need understanding, exploring and changing.

That’s easy, just book a session with me! Go to Work With Sue at thestresshacker.com.  Seriously I promise you you will feel so much happier when you reclaim your power back and stop smoking. There’s loads of free help too from the NHS here. So save your money and your health and break up with these bad boys now!

Let me know how you get on and if you have questions join me on the stresshacker’s facebook page and we can talk about it there or leave your comments below.

I’m also excited to share that I have a new Wellbeing online workshop coming up very soon so keep your eyes peeled as it also has some special offers in it.

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15 Ways To Understand Emotional Intelligence

Emotional Healing begins in the past.

 

It’s Never Too Late To Have A Happy Childhood

What is emotional intelligence? How do you stop yourself from feeling like a child when you’re pulled up at work about something. Why do you react to your own children in a childish way? Why can’t you stand up to that bully? Just how do you grow up and heal emotionally?

For almost 30 years I’ve had the pleasure of helping thousands of people to develop emotional intelligence.  I’ve facilitated many as they’ve healed old wounds and genuinely found ways to leave an unpleasant past where it truly belongs, in the past!

Whilst counselling and cognitive approaches can be great ways to understand your past, they don’t always hit the spot when it comes to ‘feeling’ better.

Many clients arrive in my therapy room after months, sometimes years of counselling elsewhere, yet still feel that they haven’t moved on.  Although they have a good understanding of their pasts, they still feel they haven’t grown up emotionally. Why is this?

The simple answer is this. You remain emotionally stuck because emotions live in your body – not in your mind. To have emotional intelligence you probably need to heal the past.

Your emotional life lives on in your physiology.

What does that mean?

Your emotions are stored in your organ body and are communicated via your physical systems. Such as the nervous system or cardiovascular and respiratory systems.

What is emotional intelligence? Is it intellectual or somatic?

Let me ask you a question. Do you feel anxious or think anxious? Often the feeling precipitates the thoughts.

For example, you wake up with a feeling of anxiety in your chest, it feels like a tight band around your chest. You add all kinds of reasoning and ‘rationale’ as to why you’re feeling that way.

You’ve got a presentation later that day. You’ve had an argument with a colleague or friend, or you didn’t get enough sleep.

You attribute these thoughts to the feelings of tightness in your chest, the thoughts build and the band gets tighter. This creates a vicious circle.

To become more emotionally intelligent learn a little about your subconscious mind and it’s connection to your body.  Discover how you can change the way you feel.

 

  1. Your subconscious mind is also your imagination, your unconscious mind and your long term memory, the other 90%. It all means the same.

  2. According to quantum physics the subconscious mind processes 44 billion bits of information per second! Read that again!

  3. This part of your mind has billions of jobs to do. One of the main jobs is to store information, regardless of whether that information is true or false. Read that again!

  4. Your subconscious mind is phenomenally intelligent, yet simultaneously childlike in quality

    This mind holds all the memories of billions other you’s from the past. Look at the photo of the Russian Dolls and imagine one doll for every moment in time. They are all you.

  5. Your subconscious mind is nothing to be afraid of … it’s just YOU!
  6. Your subconscious mind has your best interests at heart… at every stage in your life.For example if when you were 14 you had a temper tantrum with your parents and screamed inside your head over and over with great emotion  “I wish I were dead!” That part of you still holds that intention. That nano second thought in time stays there at an energetic level.
  7. Because your subconscious mind cannot identify past or future, everything just is,in the here and now. This makes healing the past possible!
  8. Time is man-made. As I write this it’s 12.30pm here in the UK yet it’s 1.30pm in France. Your subconscious has no such time restrictions, so you can change memories (and their attached emotions) in the so-called past.
  9. .Your subconscious mind is willing to help you in the pursuit of your goals and dreams. But it’s up to you to make really clear exactly what you want. You can program a brighter future, because your subconscious mind’s main job is to store information.
  10. Your subconscious mind is basically YOU and it wants to help you.  You at a conscious level are the headquarters and your subconscious awaits your instructions. In the absence of any new directives, it just carries out old programming, often in the form of negative thoughts and beliefs.
  11. The subconscious mind is connected to the systems and organs in your body. This is where you feel.  According to Eastern traditions such as acupuncture and Ayurveda your emotions live in your organs.If you have you ever heard someone say they were gutted? Or noticed someone unconsciously holding their breath in fear as they recounted an unpleasant memory?  That’s the emotion ‘held’ in the stomach and cardio- vascular and respiratory systems.

    12. Your subconscious mind is really happy to change perspective on any issue past or future, because it                  wants to help you to feel better at every level.

    13  Due to the nature of your subconscious mind, it is willing to accept changes. When you change                             perspective on an old issue it affects your physiology positively.

    14   By playing around with visualization paired with a relaxed body, you can change past events and                       program future events and physiology will obey.

    15   This is currently revealed as neuro-plasticity, yet has been known and practiced by hypnotherapists                 the world over for years!

It’s easy to re-programme your mind. Hypnosis is the fastest way to do this. By regularly downloading positive suggestions to your subconscious mind, you bypass the ‘critical factor’ i.e. the conscious mind and in as little as a week you can be feeling happier and more positive. 

As I once told a client “It’s never too late to have a happy childhood!”

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Ways to Travel Stress and Anxiety Free

Health & Wellbeing

My top travel tips to stay stress and anxiety free when travelling.

It has literally changed my life. This is what happened…

I seemed to get a cold every time I went on holiday! This had been the pattern for over ten years. It  spoilt my trips and left me feeling miserable. I wanted to travel anxiety free.

Whilst swimming  in Thailand a couple of years ago and having a chat with myself, the way you do.  I was bemoaning the fact that I had yet another cold.  I’m healthy (other than a mild lung infection) and found it puzzling.

“Not Another cold! Why?”I said.

I heard a voice inside  reply ” It isn’t a cold.  Your airways  are inflamed from the air-con on the plane”  Nothing more, just that!  It was a real eureka moment as I recognised this truth.

I totally empowered myself with the following tips…

NLP:

First I future-paced my self with an NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) suggestion. “By the time I get out of the sea all inflammation has left my lungs.”

I swam a bit longer then got out.  It was about an hour later that I realised that the ‘cold’ had gone, completely!  I’d had it for five days yet  it had totally disappeared! Not one more sniffle for the entire holiday.

Masks:

Secondly I went to a supermarket and bought some masks. Next I bought a lightweight scarf to wrap over my mouth and nose.

Health & Wellbeing
Fewer colds and infections now.

Most importantly  I wear it for the entire flight whenever I travel now. Only removing it to eat or drink. I’m effectively recycling my own warm breath and this appears to have worked.

I had started to feel wary and anxious about holidays because of the cold scenario.

But now I can relax in the confident knowledge that I’ll be okay.

I’ve had three long haul and eight European flights since then and not one cold or sniffle!

I tell my fellow passenger that I have nothing contagious just a mild lung condition that is irritated by air-con. I’ve only had one person move and that gave me more room – result!

In conclusion this totally works for me and could help you too. If you have experienced similar problems or have asthma this could be the perfect solution.

Wear a snood, scarf or gloves:

I’m now trend-setting with an array of snoods!

Especially on cold damp days or on public transport. I stay healthy and therefore anxiety free in the knowledge that I have fewer colds and infections.

Setting a trend
Setting a trend

Oh and another tip – wear gloves where possible in public places. It can cut down on germs.

Remember that  Stress Free With Confidence is a reassuring programme to listen to if you have any fears around travel. Grab your  CD or download at the shop here at www.thestresshacker.com

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Who’s In Charge You Or Your Child?

Do you avoid doing jobs because the thought of it stresses you out? Do you give up on your health regime after that first glass of wine? Are you late for things simply because you didn’t leave on time? Chances are you’re letting your inner child take control of your life…
I know, I know, you start out with really good intentions at the begining of the week. You’re going to eat sensible, healthy foods. And yet by Tuesday you’re on your second take-away.

Have you ever considered that your inner child has taken over and is running the show!

Who's In Charge You Or Your Child? Stop Letting Your Child Rule Your Life - The Stresshacker

What Happens When You Let Your Inner Child Rule

That inner whining often goes something like this: “it’s not fair, I’m tired, I don’t want to work, I can’t be bothered to go shopping, I need a treat now, I deserve it!” And giving in to it means that you – the adult – are no longer in charge. Let’s face it if you were, you might be able to have a more grown-up conversation with yourself!

Your inner adult might say something like: “I know you feel like you deserve a treat, but if you do eat those crisps or drink that extra glass of wine, your workout at the gym will feel even harder and ultimately the dress you want to look stunning in next weekend will feel tight and uncomfortable. You’re just hungry let’s get something yummy and healthy to eat right now and if you still want crisps after you can have them!”

Continue reading Who’s In Charge You Or Your Child?

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Depression. How I Coped

Sorry I haven’t been in touch for ages…there is no excuse.

There was a bout of depression that nearly got me, but I will tell you about that later.

I have just returned from a holiday in Thailand that included bathing and feeding Elephants. Seeing the process of their “poo” being turned into paper.

Learning the secrets of Thai cooking at a cookery school in Chiang Mai. Then travelling further south to explore some of the islands and their beautiful beaches. Experiencing the healing effects of Thai massage.

Why would I now feel depressed?

I became very aware of the negative internal chatter in my mind. Part of me was imploring another part of me to stay upbeat. But I couldn’t. In fact, feelings of negativity had me sinking fast!

I was feeling depressed. Why?

Was it that my wonderful holiday was over? That I’m still grieving? Maybe I was just overwhelmed by my workload? Or perhaps it’s Brexit?

What soon became clear is that the WHY does not matter. Continually exploring the ‘whys’ only brings more negative thoughts to the surface. Changing my state became my priority and doing this quickly, my goal.

Here is what I did to fight the depression

The first and most important thing was to change the “internal chatter.”

At the risk of this sounding like a plug for one of my self-help downloads, I started to listen to Stress Free With Confidence. This is a hypnosis program I made almost thirty years ago. After just two days I noticed my thinking had changed quite dramatically and as a result, found myself smiling again.

My thoughts were brighter. When a negative thought arose it quickly switched to a positive one. The change was automatic and the good thoughts began to flow again.

More importantly was the shift in my feelings and I felt more upbeat.

This helped me to get moving.

Exercise helped me move forward and invigorated me. Walking activates the heart and lungs and changes the way you breathe. When you change the breath it will often change the way you think and feel. A couple of walks in my local park and surrounding streets really helped.

So did reaching out for support from loved ones and close friends whom I was able to share my feelings with. It’s so important, in fact essential, to reach out. Call someone. Talk about it.

Yoga always gives me the space to gain insight into my feelings and this awareness helps me to “catch” myself before I fall too far. I did a slightly longer practice each day.

Having re-booted the stress free programme in the back of my mind, I also started juicing again which boosted my energy.

I applied a great Ayurvedic treatment and gave myself a top-to-toe sesame oil massage before languishing in a bath. This felt nurturing and nourishing.

Sometimes just one small change can make a huge difference to the way you think and feel.

For example if your job requires sitting at a desk all day, get up regularly and move a round. Take the stairs rather than the lift where possible.

Every journey starts with one small step.