Tag: Addictions

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Are You Fat Focused?

Do you obsess about food?
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Are you constantly on and off of the scales?

Do you worry about sticking to a diet?

Are you always counting calories?

If you don’t care about being overweight then fine, don’t read on but if you’re constantly striving to lose weight only to put it back on, or are stuck in the yo-yo pattern of dieting you might want to try a new approach.

The majority of people with weight problems tend to be consumed by thoughts of what, when and how they will eat or drink. Constant worrying about food and focusing on feeling fat are your worst enemies in the pursuit of losing weight.

I know that the easiest way to lose weight and keep it off is to change your mind-set. Here are 3 ways you can do it

  1. Update Your Mental Software.
  2. Throw Away Your Scales.
  3. Reprogram Your Mind using language it understands.

Change your mind and keep the change

 Discover the best way to finally dump your negative thoughts and feelings. Upgrade your mindset and rebuild your self-esteem with my Mindful Weight Loss approach.

1. Update Your Mental Software

Are you interested in the quickest way to do this? Hypnosis. Reprogram your mind, by-pass the negative inner chatter and input positive thoughts that will change the way you feel. 21 days of consistent listening to positive, upbeat suggestions of self-love will have you automatically making better choices. You will find everything easier when you feel positive and confident.

The biggest part of your mind, the subconscious mind believes whatever it is told. What are you telling yourself about your size, weight, or the way you look?

2. Throw Away Your Scales.file0001481171194

Hopping on and off of scales create a hopeless addiction, get rid of them, they’re work of the devil! They lie too! Have you ever jumped on your scales and felt your heart soar because you’d shed a little weight? Only to get on your friend’s scales (because you couldn’t resist) to find you’d gained some weight?

Scales encourage negative thinking that will quickly spiral you down into feeling out of control, this is my opinion based on 28 years of facilitating weight loss with thousands of people.

Stop kidding yourself. You WILL KNOW WHEN YOU’VE LOST WEIGHT when your trousers feel loose or more comfortable, or when you no longer need to loosen your belt whilst eating. Resist the temptation to  buy  clothes in bigger sizes and work your way back into the wardrobe you have, by being kind, encouraging and loving to yourself. I go into the psychology of this more in the course.

3. Picture The Best You

Picture The Best You… develop the habit of putting yourself into a gentle state of relaxation (yes, this can be done on the train on your way to work, or just as you drift off to sleep) once relaxed; create pictures of you in your minds eye being the best version of you. Imagine yourself feeling, fit, flexible and strong. If you’re visual (I’m not so I just get on and imagine) visualize yourself doing and being who you are when you are what makes you feel the best. For example, see you looking very much in control, relaxed, confident, peaceful, in love with and loving yourself. See yourself sufficiently confident to make better choices. Encourage yourself to exercise by persistently picturing yourself swimming, walking or taking a class in the gym.

Your subconscious mind believes whatever you tell it… what are you telling it?

More importantly the language of the biggest part of your mind (the subconscious) is imagery, so it prefers to receive positive images. Don’t take my word for it, try it yourself regularly.

Don’t be shy, take advantage of the Ask Sue facility here on the website and ask me any questions you have about losing weight.

If you’ve any questions about my Mindful Weight Loss course ask away! The course is unique and I created it more with the idea of helping people to become happier and more at peace with themselves with the weight loss being more a by- product of that. There is no dieting involved in this course, although you do need to want to lose weight and be prepared to make a commitment to doing so.

So if you know someone who would find this useful please pass it onto them.

 

 

 

 

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Do You Know How To Love, Accept And Embrace Yourself?

‘Be yourself, everyone else is already taken' Are you able to be yourself, to be authentic? Are you the real deal?

 In Just The Same Way That There Are No Two Snowflakes Exactly The Same, You Too Are Unique. file000904151411

Don’t you just love that quote by Oscar Wilde ‘Be yourself, everyone else is already taken’ Are you able to be yourself, to be authentic? Are you the real deal?

Using a score from 0 – 10  zero being not at all and ten being totally your true self, take a moment to score yourself right now? If you scored ten congratulations, you may not want to read the rest of this blog.

As we continue on our journey in life and encounter its ups and downs, many people lose themselves along the way, whilst others struggle to find out who they really are. People can get lost in roles, dramas, addictions and illness to name just a few of the paths that can lead us away from who we really are.

What stops you from being the real genuine you? Is it childhood conditioning, or perhaps your good manners? Is it the fear of not being good enough, liked enough, loveable enough? Is it pretending to be what you think others want you to be?

Whatever the reasons, there will be a price to pay if we don’t find our way home to being who we really are.

Psychologist Carl Rogers believed that like a flower that will grow to its full potential if the conditions are right, so too will humans, given the conditions. He believed that the fundamental drive of humans is to flourish and thrive – to be the very best we can.

If Rogers was right, can we blossom and bloom if we constantly compromise ourselves by dancing to someone else’s tune? Betrayal of another is bad enough, but betrayal of ourselves, is the highest betrayal of all.

Rogers’s ‘congruency model’ is an interesting one. The face in the centre, is the real ‘you’. At the end of the arrows are the roles we adopt over time – such as the perfect mother, the long suffering wife, the dutiful husband, the protective brother, the hardworking teacher, nurse, banker and so on.Rogers' Model

We are placed in these roles, by families, our culture, society, our peers, and of course by ourselves.

Rogers said the bigger the gap between who we really are (Self) and who we are having to be to keep everyone happy, is where incongruence lies.

Incongruence is a word you tend to hear more of in the therapy world. It explains that sense of inauthenticity we can feel when a relationship is well and truly over and we cannot pretend any longer. Or the growing anxiety that presents itself every Monday morning when we can no longer face the pretence of going into the office and working with the people we have come to loathe. Or the job and its demands that we can no longer cope with.

In the gap between who we really are and our ‘role’ are things like panic attacks, eating disorders, sleeping disorders, psycho-somatic illness, phobias, addictions or any of the other things that we can all suffer with at different times throughout life.

So what do we do? How do we close this gap and become more congruent, more real?

We can start by making an honest assessment of our roles. I believe we need some time and space alone in order to ask ourselves honest questions and listen carefully, until we hear more truthful answers. Perhaps developing the habit of meditation for just 10 minutes a day or spending time in nature, going for a walk by the sea or in a national park.

In an ideal world, we will have the love and support of someone who doesn’t judge or criticise us, someone who will listen unconditionally. If you’re lucky you’ll have a good friend who you can talk to. If not, think about using the services of counsellors, coaches or support help lines.

Get into the habit of asking yourself this question regularly “Is this thing I’m doing or thinking kind and loving to myself”?

Find ways to build your self-esteem; improve your communication skills; learn to be more assertive so that you can deal more confidently with conflicts and difficulties.

Find ways to love and nurture yourself more. Work on forgiving yourself and others for their wrongdoings and fallibilities. In so doing, set yourself free from the heavy burden of judging.

‘Be yourself, everyone else is already taken' Are you able to be yourself, to be authentic? Are you the real deal?

And remember the aim: Be Yourself, Everyone Else Is Already Taken!

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Are You Working Too Hard? Here are 11 signs…

Twee as it may sound, ‘all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy’ is a truism.

Signs you're working too hard

Below are 11 signs that you may be overdoing it on the work front.These indicators that you are no longer coping with this aspect of your life can be a gateway to a better existence. It is often said that life is a journey, well if that’s true what kind of a ride are you having?

If you relate to any of the symptoms below, then it may be time to make positive changes. Developing a better balance between the various parts of your life could make your journey more of an adventure.

1. You can no long contain your anger

Sudden angry outbursts or angry reactions disproportionate to the event/conversation, constant sniping or unpleasant jibes are symptoms of stress. Incessant anger can be an indicator of a deeper issue such a loss or bereavement.

2. You’re behaviour is irrational

Have you found yourself doing something completely alien to you like booking a train to somewhere you’ve never been or spending a lot of money on inappropriate clothing or things for the home? Behaviour that is out of the ordinary can be a sign of stress and that you’re over-doing it in the workplace.

3. You break down in tears without warning

If you are usually quite controlled, but start breaking down in tears at the slightest thing you may need a break!

4. Complete loss of interest

A sure sign of stress is boredom with everything in your life and a lack of desire to see friends, or go out and join in your usual activities. Constant thoughts of ‘why bother’ or ‘what’s the point’ are angry thoughts – albeit inverted anger – which can present itself as a mild depression.

5. Sleep problems

Are you finding it hard to get off to sleep? Are you waking constantly throughout the night or waking early?? Perhaps you are falling asleep at inappropriate times? Sleep disturbances are a cue that something is out of balance in your life: there’s too much going on and your brain is not resting at the right time.

Smoking stress

6. Mental Confusion

One client described her mental confusion as fuzziness, “it’s like someone has taken my brain and put cotton wool in its place”. If you’re finding it difficult to concentrate and apply yourself maybe you are overdoing things on the work front.

7. Physical Symptoms

Physical manifestations of stress include feeling over-heated (and irritable as a consequence). Certain types (A personality) may feel mentally hot and a rising heat in the body, which pushes their irritability up even further.

8. Onset of panic and anxiety

Feelings of dread, panic and anxiety in the stomach, chest and throat suggest that you’re struggling to keep on top of things. Maybe you feel overwhelmed with the responsibilities or fear you won’t cope with your workload.

9. Change in eating habits

If you are overeating and constantly focused on your next snack or meal, or conversely have completely lost your appetite and never think about eating, it may be time to look at your workload.

10. Obsessions

Any disproportionate urge to ‘use’ – be it cigarettes, alcohol, drugs, sex, exercise, food, gambling, shopping or any other ‘fix’ – is a pointer that all is not well.

11. Phobias

A sudden onset of a phobia or compulsion may suggest work overload.

So are you working too hard? Stay tuned for 11 things you can do about it.

For a stress-free life, download the Stresshacker self-hypnosis audio