March 8th is International Women’s Day and YouTubers and Twitter users are part of the #DearMe campaign that aims to ‘empower young women everywhere’. Women all over the world are writing and recording messages of advice and wisdom to their younger selves, to drive the message home.
Many psychotherapists offer similar techniques when aiming to empower clients. Having people close their eyes and imagine connecting with a younger part of themselves, then offering support, love or protection to that younger part can be an incredibly empowering and healing intervention.
This is because the subconscious mind cannot tell the difference between something real or imagined.
It lacks the power of discernment and will readily accept a new and improved version of an event (it’s a bit more complex than that, but that’s it in a nutshell). The subconscious mind is not time bound so doesn’t really recognise past or future, it just IS. As such, rescuing a hurt inner child and comforting it really does make that part of you feel better.
A lack of self-esteem partly arises from us rejecting ourselves at different points in our lives
If we have ever felt isolated, guilty, lonely, bullied, blamed or shamed we may reject that part of ourselves in an attempt to feel better. By banishing that aspect we aim to feel worthy and more loveable. That may work as a temporary measure but we are likely to feel empty and unloveable as adults unless we heal and empower these parts.
So here’s my challenge to you this week
(Oh and it isn’t just for women since I know I have some male readers too). Sit down with a pen and paper (you know my rule about being creative away from the computer) and write a letter from you now, to your younger self. Offer words of support, love and compassion.
If you really could step back in time and re-write the script and tell yourself not to worry, to recognise your skills and talents what would that letter look and sound like? Give it your best shot, imagine that you really are sitting there with the younger you, who most needs help and encouragement, try asking what that part of you really needs to feel positive and confident then take a few moments to listen, really listen to the inner response from that part. You might be surprised what comes up.
Here’s a clip from my letter to a younger part…” continue to care about others, Sue, that’s a really nice aspect of you, and make sure that you care about yourself just as much too. It’s okay to put yourself first sometimes.”
Let me know how you get on. If you need extra help try Stress Free With Confidence or Super Charge Your Self Esteem from the shop.