Hi Stresshackees
Last week I said that, rather predictably, I would look at some goal setting. Well come on, it is that time of year where we have a little bit of time to take stock, to look at where we are and what we’re doing.
I’ve often found January a time where the energy of the New Year seems to bring with it an element of hope that you can affect a change or make a new start.
So Why Would You Set A Goal?
Well, you don’t have to. It can be quite romantic drifting from here to there, unless there is something you really want to have or somewhere you want to go. In which case it would be better to have a map, a plan.
Even young travellers that take off to see the world, plan the route ahead to some degree and have some idea of a few stops along the way. They picture in their minds the things they want to see, places they want to stay, or the experiences they want to have.
As my favourite coach Brian Tracy says ‘start with the end in mind’.
So what do you want? What do you need? If you could journey out into the future and be standing at the end of December 2015 looking back over the year, what would you like to think you have achieved?
Start to picture it now. It doesn’t have to be anything major but it does need to be meaningful to you.
Here’s a smart little exercise.
How to Set Goals
Pick one of the following areas to work on:
Relationships
Finances
Career
Personal Goals (you know: that course, that holiday, that new car…)
Or any other area in your life that you’d like to work with.
Now follow these steps:
- Write in a positive way exactly what you want. The important thing is, the goal must be dependant upon what YOU do. So for example it’s no good saying ‘I want my mother/partner to change so that we get along better!’ A clear, positive goal is ‘I want to improve my relationship with my mother/partner.’
- Know the evidence for your goal. How will you know when you’ve achieved it? For example ‘I feel much happier with the time I spend with my mother/partner now’ relates more closely to the goal than ‘I now see mother less often’.
- Decide where, when and with whom you want your goal. Consider all the senses, what it will look like, how will it smell or what will it taste like? What will I hear and what will I feel. These are all good quality questions. Meaning, you’re more likely to get good quality answers.
- What stops you from achieving your goal? What are the obstacles? Look only at things that are within your control to change. Remember, you have no power to change anyone else!
- What skills, talents and resources do you already have to help you achieve your goal? For example, you may already have a great relationship with your Dad, sister or aunt, so you know you can have good relationships.
- What other resources or skills would you need in order to reach your goal? Maybe reading a book on assertive skills or talking things through with a friend or coach could help you look at your relationship mother/partner in a different way.
- Create the map, make the plan. How are you going to achieve your goal, what will the first steps be, write them down they should be specific and achievable.
When you follow these steps you will be amazed at how accurate this process is in helping you to achieve your desired outcome.
This is a basic coaching tool to help you clarify what you want and how to get it. It works with any topic, so go ahead and use it over and over with any area of your life and watch the positive results!
Please let me know how you get on and if anything isn’t clear send feedback because it will likely help others.
Until next time
Enjoy!
Suex
