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Are You Ready To Confront Your Fears In 2016?



Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway was one of the first and best self-help books I have ever read, in it, author Dr Susan Jeffers encouraged us to ‘go for it ‘ despite our fears and anxieties.

We can become more emotionally robust and courageous and it is possible to develop the courage to overcome fears and anxieties, but they wont go away on their own, without doing some work with them.

Here’s a quick exercise to spark courage.

Ensure you won’t be interrupted for five minutes. Close your eyes and ask yourself “where abouts in my body does courage live” intuitively go to the first place that comes to mind.

If you feel that you lack courage, then ask yourself “where in my body is the place where I lack courage”

Once you have located the place that this feeling or lack of it resides (it may be in your stomach, your chest or heart for example) then ask your subconscious mind or imagination to give you a colour, shape or size that represents this feeling.

As soon as an image, picture, shape or colour, comes to mind, just accept it. Now ask the picture (shape, colour) what it (the image) wants to do so that you can feel more courageous. Usually the image will change, sometimes dramatically, sometimes in a very minor way. Sit, sense and notice what shift takes place in your image, colour or shape. I know it feels a bit odd talking to yourself in this way but aim to lend yourself to the experience in order to get results.

As soon as there is a change from your original image, even the slightest change, the exercise is complete and you can open your eyes. You are likely to notice an improved sense of courage over the coming days. You can repeat this exercise as often as you wish.

Physiologically there’s a fine line between fear and excitement both states involve breathing more quickly for example.

Our inner chatter can also determine how we feel, so what we say to ourselves is really important. It can be helpful to reframe a fearful feeling and tell yourself that this feeling is excitement, it’s anticipation, kid yourself and act as if you are brimming with courage.Assertive Empowerment Now

If you’ve set goals and decided to ‘go for it’ in 2016 you might find the Assertive Empowerment Now audio hypnosis program  a great support for you. Programing the deeper subconscious mind on a regular basis with positive words of encouragement and support can really help us to step up to the challenges we set ourselves. We can then approach goals with greater confidence. Using mind tools such as this audio program is a practical way of making positive changes quickly and with minimal effort, simply play the recording when you go off to bed each night.  As you drift of to sleep listening to powerful, assertive suggestions, you can expect to feel emotionally stronger and self-assured in the following days, but don’t take my word for it, try it for yourself.

If you’re still in need of inspiration please take a few moments to watch this amazing video of Dilys Price an 82-year-old lady who regularly throws herself out of a plane! She is truly inspirational and will definitely encourage you to go for it!

As usual we love to hear your feedback and comments below.





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How are you feeling?

To understand others is to have knowledge. To understand oneself is to be illuminated

How was your festive break? Has it left you feeling rested, recharged and raring to get back to work? Or are you in need of some rest and relaxation after all the energy expended in shopping, wrapping, cooking, visiting or entertaining?

Unfortunately  for some people the Christmas period can generate anxiety. Being out of the natural routine of things can be a trigger for some, whilst others worry about having bought the right gifts, or visited the right relations in the right order. Even people who ordinarily, are emotionally robust, report feeling out of sorts, sometimes being catapulted into their family ‘roles’ can create generalised anxiety.

Whatever your current ‘state’ it might be nice to take a few moments out from doing anything at all. Will you rise to my challenge here and take ten minutes to sit still (preferably upright) and do nothing, absolutely nothing?

When you’ve finished reading this blog, come away from any distractions such as TV, computer, tablet or phone. If possible sit near a window with some natural light.

Keep your eyes open yet heavy-lidded and settle your gaze slightly ahead of you and sit still for 10 minutes.


Allow your mind to wander if it wants to and periodically come back to an awareness of your breathing.

Notice what arises when you keep still in this way. What happens physically? Do you get an itch or irritation somewhere on your body, do you suddenly need to cough, or want to shift around? Just notice.

What happens mentally? Is your mind darting rapidly from one thought to another, from the future to the past? Does the mind draw you into one particular memory that you begin to run over and over? Just notice.

What happens to you emotionally when you sit doing absolutely nothing? Do you feel uncomfortable or peaceful? Do you start to feel sad, anxious or agitated? Do you begin to feel sleepy? Is there an overwhelming desire to get up and move? Override it by calmly bringing your attention back to your breathing.

Taking small chunks of time in this way to practise the art of ‘being’ allows us to become more and more familiar with how it feels to be peaceful and we can then carry that over into other aspects of our day, approaching daily tasks with a calmer detached manner.

Over time these mindfulness techniques can help us to conquer some of the negatives that the mind throws up, so that we use the mind rather than allowing the mind to use us.

Making space to spend time with ourselves can provide opportunities  for insight and understanding of ourselves and others. The Chinese book of philosophy  the Tao Te Ching says ‘To understand others is to have knowledge. To understand oneself is to be illuminated”.

To understand others is to have knowledge. To understand oneself is to be illuminated

I hope 2016 brings enlightenment, peace and joy into your hearts and minds.

Will you accept my challenge? As always I love the feedback so please leave your comments to let us know how you got on.


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Don’t Panic! There’s Help Out There.

When Callum was discharged from hospital with the words “It’s just a panic attack” despite obvious relief (he had been admitted for a suspected heart attack) he found these words less than comforting.

Psychotherapy was his next stop.

Callum’s symptoms were terrifying to him, his heart thumping so loudly he thought it would pump right out of his chest, accompanied by a feeling of being gripped tightly around the chest and a distinct inability to breathe properly.

Among other therapeutic interventions such as managing old memories, learning meditation and relaxation, he trained himself to breathe differently by using some simple breathing techniques . This gave Callum a greater sense of control in situations where he’d previously felt fearful and inadequate.

Relax MGD©My overriding message to people suffering in this way, is that it is possible to change the way you think and feel.

Not everyone can afford counselling and therapy. You can however join a local yoga class that teaches breathing as a regular part of the class, talk to your Doctor and read up on the internet and educate yourself about the nature and reasons for panic and anxiety.

If you’re suffering from excessive stress, tension or the other things mentioned here sign up to download your free relaxation programs.

Stress Free With Confidence is a program that if listened to regularly can also help alleviate some of the symptoms of panic and anxiety.

Mean while you might find this audio clip useful. I’m always interested in your feed-back.

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Panic Attacks. Help I Can’t Breathe!

Anxiety. You never know when you glance around a train carriage who is comfortably reading their book and who is actually near to passing out with fear and panic. Nowadays anxiety is becoming more and more common, in the extreme some people can’t even complete a journey to work because their fearful feelings are so intense.

file0002062790027Panic attacks often signify the beginning of all kinds of weird rituals. From changing carriages on a train, getting on and off at different stops, through to a cycle of altering journeys times, changing modes of transport, leaving jobs and even relationships, in an effort to quell the anxiety and feel better.

Having panic attacks can be both paralysing and draining, leaving you feeling physically weak and exhausted.

What makes it worse, is that it’s all happening on the inside and nobody else can see what they’re really going through, so there is little sympathy and understanding.

The reason for one persons panic attacks will differ from the next and that is why there is no ‘one’ cure for them. You can be sure though that there is an underlying reason for this level of anxiety.

For many who suffer from this paralysing condition, it is usually coupled with frustration. It’s annoying to be unable to understand why they are happening. “Why now and why me” is a question I’m often asked by clients and students.

When people feel angry because they are unable to understand why the panic attacks happen, they will often blame it onto something else. For example if the first time you experience anxiety or a panic attack is on the bus, it’s understandable that you might associate a bus journey with them. Unfortunately it isn’t that simple.

I’ve known people whose reason for a panic attack turned out to be a ‘nudge’ from their inner self to retrain in a totally different field, because they had been unhappy in their work for a long time.

People who decide to get to the bottom of the anxiety discover that working through old wounds, such as bullying episodes at school, provided the relief from their unpleasant symptoms.

Others have discovered that emotions from past losses or bereavements have been the underlying cause of their anxiety.

Traumatic events, can remain buried in the unconscious mind and also stored somatically in our physiology. We feel panic and anxiety, usually from the chin downwards somewhere in a body part such as chest, throat, hands, stomach. The Clean Language Grovian Metaphor approach that I have been using with clients since 1991 is a fantastic technique for reprogramming the mind and body. It’s a joy to see people relax and feel inner peace as they realise these feelings have cleared.

In my opinion anxiety and panic attacks aren’t normal and they can be addressed. Here are some tips:

The quicker you get help the better.

Regular meditation can help some people feel calmer.

Listening to hypnosis programs like Stress Free With Confidence and short meditation programs like     Seven Minutes of Zen the  Autogenic Relaxation Response can be really helpful resources. Have you signed up to receive your free program The Five Minute Powernap?  These programs help and at the very least allow you feel like you are taking some control the situation.

Find someone you trust and tell them what you are going through.

Physiologically, we forget to breathe properly when we’re feeling anxious and fearful.

Believe it or not it can help if you hum a tune. Try humming Happy Birthday to yourself quietly. The sound is actually an exhalation at the end of which, you will have to breathe in again. Each time you  breathe in, you’ll  notice that you’re breathing in a little longer and deeper  then work on making your humming the out breath, a little longer.

Happy Humming.









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These are my essential survival tips for a stress-free family Christmas

How to cope with ChristmasAs Christmas approaches it can be a time of mixed emotions. There’s such a lot of schmaltzy advertising and just about everywhere you look there are images of perfect Christmas scenes.

This is not the reality for many people. Over the years I have worked with clients who dread being thrown together with relations they clash with or can just about tolerate. The struggle for these people is to honour themselves without becoming too accommodating and acquiescent in the process.

Continue reading These are my essential survival tips for a stress-free family Christmas