For starters, I love your honesty. The fact that you recognise you have a problem is a really good thing, that you know the answer is frankly amazing! This means you already have great insight into yourself, so give yourself a pat on the back for that.
You’re absolutely right, successful people have large measures of self-acceptance. They don’t have some unreasonable unattainable goal. Their confidence comes from realising that they are normal, fallible people and that making mistakes in life are valuable ways of growing and learning.
So what was it that you did that was so awful? Make a quick list of all your sins.
Once done, reflect quietly and ask yourself this question “ Would I do that again? If I had the chance to do it again would I do it differently”? If given a second chance you would do it differently then say this to yourself whilst looking in a mirror … “ (Your name) I forgive you, you are forgiven. I forgive you for what you didn’t know then”.
If on the other hand, given those same circumstances, you would do things in exactly the same way, then get real and own that! Maybe it just hasn’t got painful enough for you yet, you may have to go around a few more times before you learn that particular lesson.
Have you read ‘I Just Want To Be Happy’? Grab a copy and work through the exercises, in particular go to the exercise where I ask you to make a list of your achievements no matter how small and put them somewhere where you will be able to see them every day.
Putting the above to one side, I think if you examine your lack of self-acceptance it’s probable that much of this stems from your childhood programming. You might want to take some time to write down (on paper with a pen – no technology!) what early messages you received from your significant others. Were there constant NO’s? Did you feel criticised? Often our parents and teachers are trying to get the best from us and it can end up feeling like we’re not good enough.
It is easy to reprogram your subconscious mind, because it believes whatever it’s told! Whatever you tell yourself becomes true for yourself. So watch your thoughts! Better still change and improve your thinking.
The quickest way I know is through repeated listening to hypnotherapy programs such as Stress Free With Confidence, Super Charge Your Confidence and Assertive Empowerment Now. Re-program your mind by building your own library of programs to choose from and match them to the challenges of your day-to-day living.
My final feedback is to say, before you do anything, check in with your inner compass by asking yourself “Is this kind and loving to myself’?
I hope this is helpful to you. You’re already on the road and doing so well.